Family Talk Night Light for Couples


“I belong to my lover, and his desire is for me.” Song of Songs 7:10

Let’s face it: Sex is a topic on the mind of just about every husband and wife. (Some wives claim their husbands think of nothing else!) The physical union of man and woman is one of the most pleasurable and meaningful aspects of marriage. Yet when a couple engages in sex for the wrong reasons, intercourse quickly loses its significance and can become an empty obligation. The late Dr. David Hernandez once offered some common, “non-loving” motives for sex:

  • To fulfill one’s marital duty,
  • To repay or secure a favor,
  • As a conquest,
  • As a substitute for verbal communication,
  • To overcome feelings of inferiority,
  • As an enticement for emotional love,
  • As a defense against anxiety and tension,
  • As a form of self‐gratification without seeking to satisfy the other.

God designed sex as an intimate expression of love between husband and wife. Anything that fails to meet that standard leaves one partner feeling unsatisfied and exploited.


  • When was the last time you thought about making love?
  • Does your motive for sex ever fall into any of the above categories?
  • Have you ever felt sexually “used” by me?
  • How can we move from “having sex” toward “making love”?

Heavenly Father, You have blessed our union with sexual expression. Bless us with emotional and sexual intimacy as well. Thank You for the pleasure and wonder of married lovemaking. Amen.

  • From Night Light For Couples, by Dr. James & Shirley Dobson
    Copyright © 2000 by James Dobson, Inc. All rights reserved.
  • Sexual motives from What Wives Wish Their Husbands Knew about Women by Dr. James Dobson (Carol Stream, Ill.: Tyndale House Publishers, 1975).

T.G.I.F. – Today God is First


“While Peter was still thinking about the vision, the Spirit said to him, ‘Simon, three men are looking for you. So get up and go downstairs. Do not hesitate to go with them, for I have sent them.'” Acts 10:19-20

Peter had never preached to the Gentiles. In fact, he believed it was against Jewish law to associate with the Gentiles. God needed to change Peter’s attitude about this, so God gave Peter a vision that showed him it was permissible to preach to the Gentiles. The Spirit came to Peter and informed him that some men were about to come visit him, and he was to go with them. He went with them, and the Lord did great miracles in the lives of Gentiles through Peter.

Sometimes we are so bent on our particular belief that the Holy Spirit must do something miraculous to change our paradigm.

I was once asked to attend a conference overseas. At the time, finances were such that the very idea was ridiculous to me. The very next day a man I had met only once before informed me of this event and asked if I would come if my expenses were covered. I was dumbfounded! The Lord had sent a messenger to change my paradigm because He knew I didn’t have the faith to think of the possibility. He knew I needed help.

Do you need a paradigm shift in some area of belief? The Lord still intervenes in the lives of His people every day. Don’t be surprised when God begins to change your paradigm by giving you a vision or sending you a messenger of His choosing.TGIF, Today God Is First. Copyright © 2016 by Os Hillman. All rights reserved.

The Directing Force of Encouragement – In His Grip – Week of August 31

The Directing Force of Encouragement
by Sharon W. Betters

Encouragement Principle: The directing force behind encouragement is God’s Word.

In the months following Mark’s death, encouragement from the body of Christ helped to keep me from drowning in sorrow. But I soon realized that my own time spent in God’s Word would be what would keep me afloat long term.  My time in His Word also gave me messages of love and truth to use later, when difficult circumstances threatened to overwhelm others.

When we turn to Scripture, we enter the presence of God. And that is where we learn to face the life and circumstances He has given us. It is God who sanctifies:  our job is to participate with Him in the process.  If we respond purely on the basis of how we feel rather than on what we know, we may tend to look for ways to eliminate someone’s pain rather than searching for ways to uphold that person while God accomplishes His purposes through adversity. The more we know about God’s character through our study of Scripture, the better equipped we are to help turn another person’ heart toward Hm.  It is only through knowledge of His Word and the power of His Spirit that we can become His promise keepers.

Believing that God uses Scripture to encourage us in our circumstances and to equip us to encourage others, I viewed every Scripture offered to my family – through cards, conversations and sermons – as a lifeline to God.  I continue to trust that one day my heart will be set free frrm grief and loss because I have sought Him and found Him in His Word (Psalm 119).

The power of Scripture to direct our lives along paths of peace and righteousness has been proven in my own life and in the lives of many godly women I know Prayerfully consider your day, lay before God your need for time alone with Him ,and wait in expectation for His guidance. As you daily come into His presence, revel in His gift of salvation and the promise of His presence, and carefully consider how to spur others toward love and good deeds through the practice of biblical encouragement.  Your time with Him will direct your actions.

Reprinted with Permission from Treasures of Encouragement Planner by Sharon W. Betters, P & R Publishing

In His grip,

Sharon W. Betters
Executive Director
MARKINC Ministries

Digging Deeper:  Hebrews 10:19 – 25, Judges 4, 5

For more information from In His Grip with Dr. Chuck F. Betters please visit